Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
he just fucked me for my cheese..
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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