That's intense
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
