Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
