Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
