he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
