My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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