Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
