Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
