My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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