Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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