he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Randomize
