You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
