I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
