Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
