I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
