if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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