just come out here and I will go home with you...
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
