the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
