its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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