just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
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