Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Randomize
