Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
