I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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