people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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