I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
