I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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