I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
