I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
