dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
