sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Randomize
