He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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