but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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