you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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