I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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