I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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