scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize