i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
