I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
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