sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
