She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
