FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
