I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
