so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
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