He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
