And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
