just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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