well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I think my moral compass just broke
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
