so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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