she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
