I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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