can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Randomize
